1st time in her back door, is there like a doctor around?

Okay so I met this girl last night and we got good and drunk together, took her back to my room. Being as it was taking so long she decided to let me in the back door. It just went right in no lube or anything, and it came out clean more or less, kinda like in porn. But unlike in a porno, she went to the bathroom and screamed, she crapped blood afterward. So I took her to the I NOVA, and she didn’t want me to stay there, in case she had to call her dad, so she kissed me goodbye. Now I’m home, and I’m just wondering if I like seriously injured this girl.

...

And the award for "Most out of Left Field Topic" goes to...

But seriously, it's probably just a blood vessel, nothing major. Unless she has colitis.

It's probably a tear. But wow, I know I've drank quite a bit tonight, but I had to do a double take as to what I just read. Not something I'd expect to see on here.

And now a word from our sponsors:

[QUOTE=Waterfaller;318457But seriously, it's probably just a blood vessel, nothing major. Unless she has colitis.[/QUOTE]what's colitis?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colitis

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Originally Posted by Cornholio857

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colitis

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can say right now, hasn't got that

Quote:

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Originally Posted by drunkex

can say right now, hasn't got that

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Oh, good. My dad has it, and let me tell you, it's nasty business.

Like I said, it's probably a tear in the tissue/muscle.

I need another beer............


EDIT
I still can't believe what I just read. I know this is the "Off Topic" sub-forum but geez......LOL

You're lucky you didn't give her a pink sock doing shit like that. Always lube up son, and not just for her. Anyways, like the guys said, she'll probably be ok. Maybe a hemorrhoid or something?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Nunzio

You're lucky you didn't give her a pink sock doing shit like that.

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AAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGH! XD
*ahem*
Yeah, lube definitely would have made a difference here, I think. Without, that's a whole lot of friction going on.

For someone who newly joined a Sega forum, all your five posts so far give me the impression you're not that much into Sega as you are..other areas :P

The moment she came out of the bathroom and told you what happened, you should have cried out, "Oh God! I ALMOST STABBED YOU TO DEATH WITH MY DICK!" and then run out the door.

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_b-6kWsvn2e.../Pink+Sock.jpg

Don't give her one. LOL

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bramsworth

For someone who newly joined a Sega forum, all your five posts so far give me the impression you're not that much into Sega as you are..other areas :P

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I was a sega kid backin the day though, I owned a genny, a sega cd, 32x, and saturn all within the first year they came out.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by The Coop

The moment she came out of the bathroom and told you what happened, you should have cried out, "Oh God! I ALMOST STABBED YOU TO DEATH WITH MY DICK!" and then run out the door.

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and just left her in my house?:confused:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by drunkex

and just left her in my house?:confused:

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That would have been a great story. You have to start living your life properly, once you get a little older you do things just because of story potential. You know, leave almost enough gas in the tank, take almost enough cash... because one day when you're old, all you'll have are stories. And this one is almost great.

Yep. Some of the best stories I've ever heard are from Seniors. Alot of the ones I've heard give you a WTF moment.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by drunkex

and just left her in my house?:confused:

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Yep.

It would have left you both with a tale that had a humorous/strange ending, and God knows life needs a few "What the fuck?" moments to share with others.

Jesus Christ. What kind of retarded shit head joins a forum, makes less than a handful of posts, then proceeds to tell everyone about their romp down the hershey highway that results in some drunk girl bleeding out her ass and needing to be taken to the hospital? What the fuck is wrong with you?

She will probably be fine....man....of all places to ask something like this, a forum dedicated to video games? lol

where would be the apropriate place to ask about something like that?

GameFAQS.

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Originally Posted by old man

What the fuck is wrong with you?

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well I am mildly autistic:|

Quote:

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Originally Posted by The Coop

GameFAQS.

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Hahahaha! That's some funny Coop!

But in all seriousness, we worship Raul Julia, argue about Nicki Minaj and Snooki, and play Sega Genesis.

Don't demean our forum man. [/sarchasm]

Plus it's not like he's selling DVDs of his collection!

DVDs of his collection?

Some other guy joined the forum to pitch DVDs he made where he talks about his giant collection or something. He was basically lynched for not attempting to be a member of the community before hawking stuff.

You should write a submission for Reader Roundtable or write a review for the site. The Reader Roundtable is easy and fun, and will show people you are a Sega fan.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Cornholio857

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colitis

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I got that. A mild version (thank the gods!!), but it still sucks. I can tell you that even a tiny rip gives off a lot of blood. It probably looked a lot worse than it was. The girl will be fine ;)

Did you use a condom? Boning strangers in the ass with no condom and no lube is the fastest way to get HIV :|

Quote:

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Originally Posted by KillerBean2

Did you use a condom? Boning strangers in the ass with no condom and no lube is the fastest way to get HIV :|

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no, I did not

One word: Cull.

http://breaaire.files.wordpress.com/...y-facepalm.jpg

Quote:

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Originally Posted by KillerBean2

Did you use a condom? Boning strangers in the ass with no condom and no lube is the fastest way to get HIV :|

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Surely the quickest way to get HIV would be to inject yourself with a blood sample from somebody you know has the AIDS.

I'm not sure what amazes me more, the fact that when I logged onto my family friendly Mega Drive site to find discussions of some chaps drunken anal sex encounters or the fact this thread has reached page three without being derailed.

http://www.megadrivechamps.org/on_topic.gif

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr Smith

Surely the quickest way to get HIV would be to inject yourself with a blood sample from somebody you know has the AIDS.

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Nope. Then I would have to find a person who has AIDS and buy a syringe. That all takes time. It's MUCH faster to just sodomize the first handful of random people you meet on the streets :cool:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by drunkex

well I am mildly autistic:|

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Rep for getting pussy while being autistic. How'd you do it?

http://img51.imageshack.us/img51/5179/youhaveaids.jpg

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mr Smith

I'm not sure what amazes me more, the fact that when I logged onto my family friendly Mega Drive site to find discussions of some chaps drunken anal sex encounters or the fact this thread has reached page three without being derailed.

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This is such a bizarre topic (for Sega-16) that I think derailment is pretty pointless.


Protip: When engaging in anal sex, always use lots of lube.

Geez, everyone knows you don't put your 32X in a Genny without using the spacer first.

It's OK dude, I found You a doctor:

http://img.chan4chan.com/img/2009-03...7665943833.jpg