Originally Posted by
Phosis
Yo I was totall chillin out at my buddy Slippy Willy's house last night for this crazy house party (we call him that because of pending molestation charges) and shit was going crazy. met up with this HOT AZZ blonde named Jenny, and we like totally hit it off and stuff. I was drinking vodka shooters with rye chaser, and she was sniffing the fumes out of these permanent markers and getting all crunk and shit off that.
So newayz, we decided to go out to Willy's hot tub since he had cleaned all the dead birds out of it the day before and no one else would want to go out there because they were afraid of catching bird AIDS or whutevr. so we are sitting there, and started kissing in the hot tub, and she started running her hands up my legs and everything, and put my hand on her tit!! and it was like under the bikini and stuff and it was awesome!! anyways were sitting there and she starts asking me if ive ever "gotten porky" before, but I didnt know what they meant so i was like "nah girl but id sure as bunk fuck get porky with you!" and then she bit my ear pretty hard like too hard so it wasnt really sexy and i think there was a bit of blood but it was dark so it could have been maple syrup or something from the pancakes i had that morning cuz i didnt have time to take a shower and shit before i went in there.
so she leaves the pool, her ass all bouncing whimsically while shes walking to the house and im sitting there with a boner waiting for her to come back. and then she did but she like had a plate in her hand and i couldnt really see what was on there. so she gets in the hot tub with this plate and there is like something pink on there, and she starts shoving it into my mouth and making oinking noises . and then she starts like putting her foot on my dick really hard and tells me to "get porky with her, BOOYA!" and I dont know whats going on at all so im just rollin with it and i realize im eatin something that tastes like bacon but its really ham and shes rubbing the ham all over hersle fnad its getting in the hot tub and stuff!
it was kind of starting to turn me on but then a biiiiiiiiiiiig piece of ham got stuck in one of the jets, and the hot tub started bubbling and making this grindy sound! So shes all like "OHFUCKOHFUCK oink OHFUCK" and gets out of the hot tub and slippy willy comes out and hes like "OH FUCK ME YOU GOTTA BEE KIDDIN YOU WERE GETTING PORKY WITH THIS GIRL, IN MY FUCKING HOT TUB?" And now he wants me to pay the damages! But the girl gave me my number so I dont know what to do!!
SO what do you guys think?? have any girl ever get porky with you before??? should i call her??? and do you thik i shoudl have to pay the damagaes for the hot tub?????
HELP ME PLZ, I wanna kno lol
